We are a work in progress. We constantly evolve and adapt. Our situation changes, we move and start a new life in new surroundings, change jobs, we make new friends, get a new life partners, we may welcome kids or pets into our life etc. Whether they are from our own making or life imposed on us, we are forced to adapt and change our habits and routine on a regular basis.
The same goes with our sexuality. Most of us will go through phases. There are times in our life where we have a lot sexual drive and interest where sex will take a bigger place in our life. Other periods where we have less interest or energy and it will take a backseat.
There are moments where we realize what was once “working” for us no longer does. What happened? It’s simple, our body changes over time and as we age, after injuries / accidents, after giving birth or after trauma, illness, relationships or simply time. We may find ourselves no longer responding the same to what used to stimulate and arouse us. We must then rediscover our body again and re-train ourselves to get pleasure from it.
Other sources like depression, self-esteem, weight gain, aging can have a major impact on our libido. The brain is the first and foremost sexual organ and a lot of blockage can happen at that level too. Those barriers are the most challenging ones to overcome but doable with the right support.
In some cases, we may never get back to where we once were. We need to remember that intimacy and sexuality is the experience of sharing the enjoyment and pleasure we get from our body. It should not be goal oriented and approach.
A lot of people resist change. It’s normal since we don’t like the unknown and will prefer the comfort of the familiar or the status quo. There is no escape though so embrace it whatever it is, see the excitement and opportunity for a fresh start and the blank slate.
