What is sensuality?
It is the concept of how we connect to and experience our body, other bodies, and the world around us. It’s a way to positively inhabit our body.
Being sensual will help you discover your body. It’s an empowering and healing practice. It is the active listening of our sensations. Savoring the moment and being there, now and forgetting about everything else. Abandoning ourselves into the moment, cutting off all the noise and focusing on pleasure and sensations.
Furthermore, sensuality is noticing what makes us feel good and taking the time to appreciate and enjoying it. It’s anything pleasurable that we experience through our senses. Touch, smell, taste, sight, hearing.
It can be.
- Closing our eyes and enjoying the warmth of the sun on our face.
- Enjoying fresh sheets in your bed
- Touching yourself or your partner to get goosebumps
- Enjoying our hair washed at the salon or someone brushing or caressing our hair.
- The pleasure of having our feet in warm sand or fresh grass
- Listening to music or a song that brings us sweet memories.
- The comfort of someone’s voice or the laugh of someone you love
- Smelling the perfume or scent of our lover
- The smell of your favorite dish
As we can see sensual is not always sexual and equally, sexual is not always sensual. While passionate sex, where we rip each other’s clothes, skip foreplay and give in to our primal urges can be intoxicating so can be sensual, at the other end of the spectrum, slow sex where we take our time to feel the most simple caress and sensation can be exquisite and offer unsuspected stimulation.
Slow sex / sensual exploration can be
- Having your partner slowly kiss you from head to toe
- Eating a rip fruit naked with your partner and not worry about the mess
- Whisper to each other ears during an embrace (sweet or dirty talk)
- Pausing to stare deeply at each others eyes before kissing
- Making out at odd moments and places (without leading to sex)
- Holding hands during sex
- Dancing naked
To be sensual, we must liberate ourselves from our self-awareness, low self-esteem, body issues, mental blocks etc. We forget about our outer layer and view our physical suit just as a vehicle for sensation and pleasure. Then we realize that sensuality is bigger than the physical experience in our bodies and with another body. It transcends physicality and becomes a more ethereal experience.
The more we are connected to our body, the more pleasure we can harvest which then increases our sexual confidence and self esteem. Simply put, If we enjoy our body and appreciate the pleasure it gives us, we will be a lot more receptive to the idea that someone else might equally enjoy our body and derive pleasure from it. Anyone can benefit and feel fantastic from being more sensual.
Similarly to meditation, where we focus on our breathing, in practice, it’s normal from time to time to have our mind wander and go off course. We simply bring it back to our breathing. The same applies to being sensual where we actively “listen” to the sensation we experience with our body. If our mind wanders we simply bring it back to that state of listening and focus on sensation and pleasure.
The beauty of it is you can do this alone. Just notice these little things that give you pleasure. Make a list even. Try it!
